Cancer, Anxiety and Some Harassing, Stalking Neighbors

At what point in the history of this great country had it become okay for people to think that they can control their neighbors yards in order to please themselves?

As if I haven't had enough stress and anxiety with the blow of breast cancer, the loss of my left breast, the frustration of ill-filling clothes, the anxiety and never ending thought of a recurrence, my mother disowning me and telling me that my cancer was God's punishment, marriage to a widower with three young children, I now have...

Pond piranha.

Our lovely neighbor, bless her heart, who resides across the pond from us has taking a liking to harassing us.  All of this because she finds our BACK yard unsightly.

About 2 or 3 years ago, at the height of my cancer stress, some "concerned" neighbor felt the need to contact the Town and report us as having had a nuisance in front yard, about 15 feet from the road.  It was a large trunk of the remains of a deceased, very old Willow tree.  Fine.  God forbid we have a dead tree in our yard next to the pond.  We spent the day with it chained to the truck cutting it and pulling it out.

Interestingly enough, we replaced the tree with another willow tree which has since died.

Then, the following spring, we let the kids take the kayak into the pond taking turns.  Next think I know, I looked out the back window to find a police officer speaking with my husband.  Again, a nice neighbor of ours called the police to report that they were "concerned" (yes, that was the word used) about children in a boat, in the pond (a two foot deep pond) without life vests on.  Seriously?  Even the officer looked at us like it was one of the nuttiest calls he has had to respond.  Officer informed us that there wasn't anything he could do about it, as there was nothing illegal going on.

In the meantime, a portion of our pond wall grew tired and began collapsing.  Estimates my husband received ranged from anything from $10,000 - $40,000.  Money which we do not have for repairs or replacement.

My dear husband took it upon himself to salvage as much as he could of the wall and that portion of our yard by layering stones to keep the yard from washing out.

Apparently, our lovely, bless her heart, female across the pond was totally unhappy with this.  As my husband worked in knee deep sludge laying out stones, she felt the need to begin taking pictures.  Hubby took a break, we sat in our yard enjoying a beer, when the paparazzi pushed her way closer and began taking pictures of us as we sat peacefully in our yard.  When we realized she was photographing us, we smiled and waved to her.

Whoa!!  She went ballistic.  She yelled profanities at us, shot us the middle finger, and stormed off.  Apparently, what was being done did not meet her approval.  It was something she just couldn't handle looking at.  They contacted the HOA, who has no control over it.  There is no requirement to have a retaining wall.  Said HOA contacted the Town to report a "structure" violation.  This also went no where as two people from the Town felt this was not their concern so long as the wall was not a hazard and not impeding drainage.

Ok.  So, we figured, done deal.

Not.  It was reported again to the HOA, who amusingly enough, reported the neighbor by name and address in the neighborhood newsletter and that he was requesting help from the HOA with a neighbor's unsightly yard.  (um, BACK YARD).

Approximately two weeks later, said female neighbor was witnessed in the yard of a neighbor behind us, shooting her camera at us, our home, the back of our garage (which by the way she is unable to see from her home) as well as other photos.

A week after that, we receive, probably the most unprofessional letter from an attorney notifying us of the pain his client is experiencing from the sight of our yard.  My goodness, the photos enclosed were taken with a zoom lens.  Now, really, does she spend the day viewing our yard through magnified lenses?

Most amusing to me was the "complaint" about our shrubs against our screened porch.  My guess is that this annoys her and limits her ability to view our activities on our porch with her binoculars and telephoto lens.

I'm not cutting this down, nor am I trimming it.  It is in our BACK yard, against the back of our porch providing shade and privacy.

I just don't know how much of this I can take before having a nervous breakdown.  I feel that my privacy has been violated.  I no longer open my shades in the kitchen for fear that I am being watched.  I can no longer enjoy my back yard on a nice sunny day without the stress and fear that she will step out and begin screaming and yelling at me and taking pictures.  After all, if she will drive around the block and enter another neighbors yard to take pictures of things she can't even see from her yard.... how far will she take this?

More pills.

How much can a stressed out breast cancer patient take from an abusive neighbor?

BTW, here is the "unsightly" yard with the stones removed and a couple of asparagus ferns for, well, I don't know, just because I love asparagus ferns and I think they look good draping over the wall.